There’s more to it than you think

The more informal standard greetings: There are many words on the effective end of our list like zombie , band , tattoo , literature , studying , vegetarian yes! Talking about specific things that interest you or that you might have in common with someone is a time-honored way to make a connection, and we have proof here that it works.

Awkward , sorry , apologize , kinda , and probably all made male messages more successful, yet none of them except sorry affects female messages. A lot of real-world dating advice tells men to be more confident, but apparently hemming and hawing a little works well online. It could be that appearing unsure makes the writer seem more vulnerable and less threatening.

How to Write Your First Online Dating Message

It could be that women like guys who write mumbly. Mentioning your religion helps you, but, paradoxically, it helps you most if you have no religion.

These are the religious terms that appeared a statistically significant number of times. So while you should avoid using netspeak too much, using slang or an unusual greeting is considered a great move. You could always spruce it up a bit and go with a foreign greeting, but make sure you know what it means otherwise you could come off looking like a bit of a Del boy.

While everybody enjoys compliments on their looks, focusing too much on physical looks seems to imply shallowness. Messages using words like beautiful and sexy will more often than not end up getting deleted immediately.

First Message Online Dating Formula That Works (With Examples) - Beyond Ages

Better to focus on interests, or even better, common interests. Talking about your own interests can give the recipient a good idea of what you are like. Nothing starts a conversation quicker than a question, so do yourself a huge favour and simply ask one. I know this is not marketing school but, like a marketer, you are trying to reel someone in.

And just like an ad agency makes a call to action, you can too, by simply asking about an interest or even suggesting a dinner date. Unless you are actively seeking a partner of a specific faith, then it is probably a good idea to leave out any religious words in your first message.

Seven steps to write your perfect online dating message

Religion is always a bit of a minefield in the dating game and you really need to be careful not to offend anyone or risk being offended yourself. Strange how in the world of dating we have always been told that self confidence is extremely attractive, but the opposite holds true with regards to online dating.

• 2. Create an intriguing opening line.
• First Message Strategy #1: Go For Laughs.
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• Exactly What To Say In A First Message – The OkCupid Blog.
• Exactly What To Say In A First Message.

Struggling to think of the right thing to say to an attractive match? This is basic, but sometimes daters forget that the first thing a match will do when they receive an interesting message is click on the profile of the person who sent it. For more advice, check out our top tips for writing your online dating profile.

First Message Strategy #2: Connect On Common Ground

Just aim for something pithy and personalised. If your match mentions loving a specific film, use a quote from it as your subject. If they love a certain stand-up comic, use the beginning of one of their jokes you know. Research has shown that people warm towards hearing their own name in conversation.

Make it sweet and fun. Instead, start by saying what caught your eye about their profile.