Is online dating a sin? What does the Bible say about things like online dating? While the Bible obviously never directly talks about online dating, the wisdom found in Scripture can certainly help us answer many of the common questions Christian singles have when they are considering online dating. So here are 7 points to consider when it comes to online dating as a Christian single. What he really cares about is who you decide to spend time with, date, and then marry.
We should use wisdom here.
Should Christians Use Online Dating?
It would be a lack of solid reasoning to assume you have a good chance of meeting a great Christian spouse by bar-hopping every weekend. Likewise, randomly throwing your profile online for the whole world to see is probably not going to be an effective way of finding a godly spouse with a desire to glorify God. So in that sense, God really does care how you go about trying to meet people. But as long as you are relying on biblical wisdom, listening to the counsel of your Christian community, and truly trying to honor God, there is nothing inherently sinful about online dating.
Again, what God really cares about is who you marry, not how you meet this person. God commands Christians to marry other Christians 1 Corinthians 7: As long as this is your goal, there is nothing wrong with using online dating. Listen to what John Piper has to say about online dating by clicking here. While online dating is not a sin, there are many dangers to online dating for Christian singles. Social media is so tempting to misuse because it is so easy to portray ourselves however we want.
We can take the perfect picture, phrase our sentences just right, and reveal only the most flattering information about ourselves. So if you decide to give online dating a chance, you have to know yourself.
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Are you easily wowed and gullible? Do you really think everyone online is there with good intentions? If you know you have a history of picking guys who are handsome over honoring, rich over respectful, or charismatic over Christ-centered, then you need to be very careful online dating. If you are a guy who instantly maxes out the credit cards when a pretty girl gives you attention, again, you need to be extra cautious when mingling online.
If you lack discretion, if you are not known for your discernment, or if you are easily wowed by surface information, then online dating might not be for you. If nothing else, at least ask a friend to keep you accountable as you search for a godly spouse online. Online dating is a pretty bold move. You are making a serious step forward in being very active and not passive in your hopes to find a spouse. The danger here is that once you start pressing forward, you might press forward too hard and compromise since you want to find a Christian spouse so bad.
This is where Christian accountability will really benefit you. But make sure you include other Christians in this process who you respect. Bounce ideas off of them. Let them do some searching too on your behalf. Also, this is just a good safety tip.
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If the person you are dating is solid, he or she will respect your concern for safety and appreciate the effort you are putting in to find a solid spouse. At minimum, tell other people who you are going to meet and where you are meeting them. Dating is an emotional rollercoaster.
I know that is impossible to do perfectly.
And quite frankly, this is a serious thing. Trying to find the person you are going to spend the rest of your life with is no small matter. With all that said, you are going to wear yourself out if you take each date too seriously. Just go on a date and enjoy it for what it is. Will you probably jump way ahead in your mind, imagining if this person will make a good dad to your 3 children named Heather, Austin, and Frank?
But then come back to reality and live with realistic expectations. Apparently, there is something special to be found online for the single heart that chooses to look there.
Where Does God Factor? All good little Christian boys and girls are taught that God will bring you your future mate. This passive approach to life is especially impressed upon us women. Why not have someone help you find the love of your life? Why have we been leaving the most important decision of our lives up to chance?
When asked, many of my happy couples said that God led them to the Internet, and they know that it was His guidance that brought them together in this non-traditional sense. It makes sense since He is a non-traditional God.
Should a Christian use a dating service to find a spouse?
Another concern is the perceived increased chance of meeting someone crazy, socially inept or worst yet… married. The anonymous nature of conversing online is like a mating call to the weirdos of the world. The good online services have methods to minimize your contact with these types of people. Extensive questionnaires, private chats with usernames, and in-depth personality profiles are now common features on the leading matchmaking services.
Some of these test results are surprisingly insightful. The process of finding someone could actually help you find yourself. Go with sites recommended by friends who have used them. With the right service, meeting someone online is no more risky than meeting someone at Starbucks. Whatever Happened To Romance?
Your eyes meet from across the room. You reluctantly go on a blind date only to be enchanted by a stranger. He grabs your soy latte by mistake. You laugh, you talk, you marry two years later. We all have our fantasies about that first magical meeting. Which would you rather have: There are a lot of good reasons to stop envying the bride and groom and go find your own wedded bliss on the Web. But the most important thing is to listen to the Lord.
What is He saying about your future spouse? We must, above all else, seek His will for our lives. It is easy to let the feelings of being left out of love cloud our thinking. Free your mind to the possibilities. Jones is the Multi-Media Producer whose profile headline would read: Drop me a line.